Learn to put your own oxygen mask on first so you can help yourself manage and reduce stress.

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Do you ever feel like you have to be everything to everyone all the time and you always come last? I feel you. Life is busy. There never seem to be enough hours in the day and when the day comes to a close we often realize how little we did for ourselves. And then someone comes along and still wants a piece of us. That is one of the reasons why I changed my daily habits. I put myself first, early in the morning, so that at the end of the day, no matter what kind of day I had, I knew I at least did something for me.

Just like they say in every airplane during their safety spiel: put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others. This too should apply in everyday life. You can’t be your superhuman self if you never put yourself first. Put your own mental, physical, and emotional needs first, first thing in the morning, then you’ll be charged and ready to serve everyone else you have to serve on a daily basis. It may seem counterintuitive because it puts more things on your daily to-do list, but doing just a little something for you, alone, all by yourself, is quite magical.

I’ve never been a morning person myself, and my Mom would probably roll over in her grave if she knew my new daily habit is to get up at 4.30am every morning (except weekends) to have that little bit of peace and silence all to myself. When I skip this time, I feel much more stressed and rushed throughout the day and am always mad at myself at the end of the day because I feel like I robbed myself of what I needed most to keep myself balanced and sane.

I don’t only do this to do something good for myself, but I do it to manage life’s daily stressors better. Stress can have profound effects on our bodies and could even impact our life expectancy. And since I want to live to 100, it’s crucial to that I take the time every day to keep stress under control.

How Stress Affects the Body

As background: when we encounter a stressor, be it a tight deadline or a sudden life change, our bodies release hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones trigger the “fight or flight” response, preparing the body to respond to the perceived threat.

While this response is good in short bursts, chronic stress exposes the body to a constant flood of these stress hormones. Prolonged exposure can lead to a range of health issues affecting basically all the systems in our bodies.

The Cardiovascular System

One of the most significant effects of chronic stress is its impact on the cardiovascular system. Stress contributes to the release of cholesterol and triglycerides into the bloodstream, increasing the risk of arterial plaque buildup. This process raises blood pressure and elevates the likelihood of developing heart diseases, including hypertension and coronary artery disease. Over time, this strain on the cardiovascular system can significantly reduce life expectancy.

The Immune System

Stress also has a profound effect on the immune system. Chronic stress can suppress immune function, making the body more susceptible to infections and illnesses. This weakened immune response may lead to prolonged recovery times and an increased risk of developing chronic conditions. As a result, individuals experiencing chronic stress may find themselves falling ill more frequently and facing longer periods of compromised health.

The Nervous System

The impact of stress isn’t limited to just physical ailments; it extends to mental health as well. Prolonged stress can disrupt the balance of neurotransmitters in the brain, contributing to mood disorders such as anxiety and depression. Additionally, chronic stress has been linked to an increased risk of neurodegenerative diseases, including Alzheimer’s and dementia.

The Digestive System

The digestive system is not exempt from the effects of stress. Stress can lead to issues such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), indigestion, and inflammation of the gastrointestinal tract. Long-term digestive problems not only affect the quality of life but can also contribute to nutrient deficiencies and other health complications.

Reproductive System

For both men and women, chronic stress can impact the reproductive system. In women, stress may disrupt menstrual cycles, leading to irregularities or even fertility issues. In men, stress has been associated with reduced sperm quality and testosterone levels. These effects on reproductive health can have significant implications for family planning and overall well-being.

Life Expectancy and Stress

The cumulative impact of stress on various bodily systems raises an essential question: can chronic stress actually shorten life expectancy? Research suggests that the answer is yes. Numerous studies have linked chronic stress to a higher risk of premature death. The constant wear and tear on the body, coupled with the increased susceptibility to various illnesses, contribute to a reduced overall lifespan. Add a poor diet to that and we’re in serious trouble!

How I Manage & Reduce Stress

Sharing how I manage stress on a day-to-day basis in case it’s helpful to you:

1. Put yourself first.
   • Whether that means getting up early to have some quiet time to yourself to work out, meditate, read, or just stare at the wall in silence, carve out time to do what’s good for your soul.
2. Workout.
   • Physical activity is a powerful stress reducer. Why do you think I’m always encouraging you all to move every day?! Without exercise I would literally go insane. Working out regularly not only helps to release built-up tension but also triggers the release of endorphins, the body’s natural mood lifters. Whether it’s a brisk walk (don’t forget your weighted vest), Orangetheory, Sweatstar hot yoga, or pickleball, find an activity you enjoy to significantly reduce stress.
3. Sleep.
   • I know. We have busy lives and kids and sports and PTA and Lord knows what. But you know what? I don’t care. Sleep trumps everything. Anyone who is not prioritizing sleep is depriving themselves of so much goodness. You need enough sleep to allow your body to:
     • repair tissues, muscles, and cells as well as consolidate memories and information learned during the day.
     • regulate the hormones that control appetite, metabolism, and immune function. Conversely, lack of sleep is associated with an increased risk of chronic health conditions and weakens your immune system.
     • regulate mood and reduce stress, anxiety, and depression; increase resilience and enhance emotional stability.
     • be well-rested for cognitive functions such as concentration, productivity, decision-making, and problem-solving.
     • consolidate memories, improving both short-term and long-term memory formation and retention.
     • rest and recharge the brain to facilitate neural processes such as synaptic pruning, which helps optimize neural connections and improve overall brain performance.
4. Eat healthfully.
   • Eating healthfully might initially feel like an additional stressor because it means you probably have to change what you are doing now and get organized to be able to eat healthfully all the time, but once you’ve found your groove with prepping healthy food, it dramatically reduces meal-time stress. One, because you always have something healthy to eat and two, fueling your body and its cells with nutrient-dense foods as opposed to empty calories and disease-causing foods eliminates the digestive stress unhealthy food puts on our bodies. I follow the Nutritarian way of life. I also detox my adrenal glands every morning, which helps to keep our stress hormones in check.
5. Find a friend.
   • In-person social interactions trigger the release of the “happy hormone” called oxytocin. It promotes feelings of bonding and reduces stress. So, find a true friend, with whom you can share concerns, seek support, and foster a positive relationship with and can provide emotional support during challenging times. You know how that “girls night out” somehow always feels magical? It’s called oxytocin. You’re welcome.
6. Organize your day.
   • I plan each day the night before. I know exactly what I’m doing when, what we’re eating, and what I will realistically accomplish and what I won’t. The things I won’t accomplish, I put on a different day so as not to stress myself out at the sight of my to-do list. I use Todoist to manage myself and our family.

Other people recommend meditation. I’m not very good at it, nor do I enjoy it, so I do other things like morning pages, visualization or working out without music or a podcast. It leaves me to my own thoughts and just helps me process what’s going on around me; work, personal, everything.

When I feel stress and especially anxiety coming on, I start by practicing deep breathing to calm myself down. If that doesn’t work, then I’ll do tapping. If that also doesn’t work or I feel it’s not working well enough, then I’ll go for a brisk, long walk. This combination typically helps me reduce stress and anxiety in the moment.

If it’s work-related stress, a tip that one of my former manager’s taught me was to focus on any one task that I could completely control myself. That technique always helped me to redirect the anxiety I was having about something out of my control and focus my energy on something where I had total control.

Regardless of what you do, just know stress affects our entire being and too much of it can have serious effects on both your physical and mental health; even impacting your life expectancy. Stress will never go away but hopefully you can use the above tips to put yourself first, manage the stress better, and be there longer for those who depend on you.

How Stress Can Make You Sick (video)

Ways You May Not Have Realized Stress Affects Your Body: https://integrishealth.org/resources/on-your-health/2023/august/ways-you-may-not-have-realized-stress-affects-your-body

Chronic Stress Can Hurt Your Overall Health: https://www.columbiadoctors.org/news/chronic-stress-can-hurt-your-overall-health

All the Ways Stress Can Impact Your Life: https://www.bannerhealth.com/healthcareblog/teach-me/stress

Stress and Health: https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsource/stress-and-health/#:~:text=Chronic%20stress%20can%20affect%20the,diet%2C%20a%20deficiency%20may%20occur

Diet, Stress and Mental Health: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7468813/